Election Aftermath: Post #1 - America, I cry for thee.

Originally posted November 3, 2004:

I'm going to make a series of 3 posts tonight, because they each deal with different parts of my overall response to this tragedy. The first post is criticism; the second post is defense/explanation, as much of one as I can give; and the third is optimism/hope--as much as I can give. I'll try to keep them brief.

There was one specific point last night when I knew Kerry was not going to win, and it was long before I gave up waiting on the Ohio results and went to bed.

It was when I learned that 10 out of the 11 states with anti-gay marriage amendments on the ballots were expected to pass them.

I thought at that moment, We get the leaders we deserve.  And this country does not deserve John Kerry.

When Virginia passed its hideous homophobic mariage protection law, I ranted about how everyone in Virginia should be ashamed of themselves, that they didn't do enough, that they could have fought harder, that they could have done more and didn't. I said it was to the shame of every Virginian that this law had passed.  And weatherby replied to me and said basically, 'it's not a matter of doing more--it's a matter of the fact that the vast majority of people in this country are against same-sex marriage and they aren't changing their minds.'  I thought her reply was very harsh at the time and I thought that it was a cop-out in a way, because you can always do more, I thought, to fight against ignorance and intolerance.

I didn't really get it until last night. 

What could we have done?  What more could any of us have done?  What more could I, personally, have done?  I could have talked to more people, made more phone calls, tried to get the message and the truth and the facts out there to as many people as possible.  But I have.  I have done so much and so many people around me have done so much, and just reading the concession email from MoveOn.Org just now I felt my heart breaking all over again because there was such gratitude for all the work that millions of us have done all over the country.  I am heartbroken for all the excited and positive faces at the county democratic party headquarters Monday night.  It was packed so tight with volunteers you couldn't even move.  And everyone was so hopeful.

There was nothing more that any of us could have done.  We gave so much.  And the truth is that it wasn't enough in the face of the sheer majority of voters, and the motives behind their votes.

This victory strikes at the core of my belief system: that there is an inherent rightness to things, that all things happen because of the ultimate benevolence of