To See Someone Smile
Author: Ria
Disclaimer: YnM is copy to several people, such as Yoko Matsushita and Hakusensha. It�s not mine and never will be, considering I�m just a college student struggling with a part-time job because she�s so broke. Suing me would be rather pointless. I just do this because I love to and hopefully to give others some enjoyment, too.
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: The anime and manga.
Pairings: Tsuzuki/Hisoka, Tatsumi/Watari
Warnings: yaoi, slight fluff at times, lime hints
Summary: The difference between love and lust is simple � to love someone is to want them to smile.
Author�s Notes: This came out of the desire to write something (anything) concerning the infamous picture of Hisoka in a pair of cut-off jeans posing as shorts and a shirt that wasn�t even trying to cover his midriff (It�s not why he�s not smiling, it�s why he�s not looking ready to kill someone slowly and painfully. ^_^) This was what came out of it� yeah, I don�t know how, either. Enjoy!
To See Someone Smile
The bouquet of flowers was the first hint, but later they all said a punch in the face would have been a better hint for all the notice he took.
Tsuzuki buying him snacks that he actually found edible was the second hint, but Hisoka thought Tsuzuki was just feeling guilty for all the sweets he ate in front of him. Wakaba nearly started crying in frustration.
The third hint was when Tsuzuki offered to make him tea. Of course, Watari accidentally put something in it so he became delirious and Tsuzuki had to take him home, but he supposed it was the thought that counted. He only admitted this after not speaking to either of them for four days, nearly making Tsuzuki cry in the process. Watari rolled his eyes and told him to get a clue. Wonderfully clear advice, as usual.
Tsuzuki rarely took him out to dinner, which was the fourth hint. Well, to be more precise, Tsuzuki rarely took him out to dinner to places that Hisoka liked. He couldn�t understand why Tsuzuki was so gentle and attentive, constantly shooting him looks full of meanings that he couldn�t understand.
At the fifth hint, when they went home and Tsuzuki persuaded him to dance with him, Hisoka began to realise something was up. But it was hard to think when he was pressed against Tsuzuki�s chest and all he could feel was Tsuzuki�s simple happiness and comfort.
The sixth hint, Tsuzuki kissing him, was slightly hard to misinterpret. As Watari had put it, Hisoka had finally got a clue.
Watari�s been watching him for so long that no one even doubts the sort of feelings he harbours for Tatsumi anymore. To be honest, everyone wishes he�d just get up and do something about his hopeless crush by now. But Watari, showing a kind of reluctance and self-hesitation that no one�s seen from him before, refuses to make the first move.
So everyone elected Hisoka as Watari�s unofficial mentor concerning romantic matters. Hisoka�s beginning to realise that after forty years in the Shokan division, everyone�s minds become slightly addled � it�s the only explanation for them electing him to help Watari with his crush.
His advice to Watari is simple: if Tatsumi won�t notice him the way he wants him to, then Watari must make him notice him.
Hell, it worked for Tsuzuki, considering Hisoka had been very, very oblivious.
Watari stares at him for a moment, fear and reluctance filling his amber eyes, before something like grim determination flickers across his face. He thanks Hisoka politely and settles in for some serious thinking.
Terazuma makes a bet with Hisoka that Watari still won�t do anything.
Later, they all watch in amazement as Watari strides up to Tatsumi in full view of them all, greets him politely, and proceeds to kiss him. Even more bizarre is the sight of Tatsumi kissing him back.
Terazuma scowls quite a bit when he gives Hisoka his money.
Tsuzuki loved the way he looked when they had sex. No matter how many times it happened, they way Hisoka reacted fascinated him.
The first time they were both nervous and uncertain, despite the desire raging through them. He found himself staring into Hisoka�s large eyes, almost hypnotic in their brilliance, as he moved inside him, and felt something rise in him that he�d never felt before. This was more than protectiveness, than affection, than sex, this was�
This was love; this was wanting to spend as much time as possible with someone more important to him than anyone else in the world; this was wanting to hold him, to comfort him, to make him smile as often as possible.
When they lay curled up beside each other afterwards, sated and comfortable, Hisoka smiled, a genuine smile, and Tsuzuki thought his heart would burst from that alone. Instead, he smiled back and leaned over to kiss him.
Later, when they became more confident about sex and what the other liked, Hisoka no longer looked nervous. Instead, his eyes were squeezed shut as he threw back his head, panting and making strangled noises in the back of his throat.
Though losing control was something neither of them particularly relished, both of them accepted that it always happened in sex.
But Tsuzuki considered it worth it to see Hisoka smile.
Tatsumi will never tell him, but he loves watching Watari sleep. This particular habit happened long before sex, when he stumbled across Watari dozing underneath one of the Sakura trees, 003 nestled in his hair. The Sakura fell gentle on and around him, and the entire scene was peaceful and made Tatsumi smile.
How terribly romantic. He can�t help but feel that it�s also terribly foolish of him to think so.
Tatsumi still doesn�t know what draws Watari to him, what makes the neurotic scientist find him so fascinating. He knows he shouldn�t complain, but there are times Watari drives him up the wall. He�d say something, except he�s almost positive that there are times when Watari feels the exact same way about him, so he stays silent.
Regardless of their many differences, they�re still together, their relationship almost viewed in the same way as Tsuzuki and Hisoka�s. The first few months were difficult, especially when Tatsumi learned about Watari�s habit of showing affection in public the hard way, but they adjusted, mainly because Tatsumi couldn�t stand seeing Watari so crushed about not being able to give him a morning kiss.
But there are some things that he�ll never admit, even if he can now kiss Watari good morning in the office without wanting the ground to swallow him up. But sometimes he thinks that Watari knows them, anyway.
He finds that when they�re lying in bed together and he�s gently petting Watari�s hair as he sleeps, Watari smiles gently, and it makes him happy.
Tatsumi can�t remember the last time he felt happy to make someone smile, before Watari came along.
It was a complete risk, from his point of view, and he almost didn�t go. He almost chickened out. Kami-sama be thanked Wakaba has a temper on her when provoked.
He froze when he reached the last step before he landed on the warm, sun-baked sand, unable to find the courage to step onto the beach and let everyone � especially Tsuzuki � see him. Fortunately, Wakaba happened to look up at the same time and solved the problem by calling out, �Hisoka-kun!�
Everyone glanced up. Everyone stared. More than a few jaws dropped.
Hisoka felt himself blushing as he wavered, the blush deepening as Tsuzuki turned around and saw him.
The completely and absolutely astonished expression on his face was worth the countless hours of pleading from Wakaba and even longer hours of whining from Yuma and Saya that he�d had to endure. Hisoka swallowed, before hesitantly taking the first step onto the sand.
Moments later, he found himself pressed up against Tsuzuki�s bare chest and wrapped in a bear hug that made him almost unable to breathe. �Happy now?� he managed to ask in a wheezing breath, embarrassment making him sound harsher than he intended.
Ignoring his mood, Tsuzuki instead let him go long enough so he could draw in breath, gave him a dazzling smile, and leaned down to give him a thorough kiss.
Well, that was answer enough.
Even later, when Watari ended up taking a photograph of him standing by the water�s edge with his arms behind his neck in a rare relaxed moment, Hisoka found he simply didn�t have it in him to be annoyed. Not when he�d been able to make Tsuzuki smile like that.
Some things, he�d realised over the years that he�d been with Tsuzuki, were worth the sacrifice.
There are some things that can never be forgotten, no matter how much he�s moved on since then. What he almost had with Tsuzuki is one of them. Tatsumi isn�t afraid to admit it; he has nothing to hide. Those who know what to look for can see it in his eyes, if they look hard enough.
It�s been almost a century since he and Tsuzuki were partners, and it�s almost started not to affect him anymore. But there are times, when something goes wrong in a mission and Tsuzuki blames himself, that he can�t help the wave of concern that washes over him when he sees how downcast and hopeless Tsuzuki looks. But he knows better and keeps his distance � it�s Hisoka who�s supposed to be by Tsuzuki�s side when he feels like this, not him. Not anymore.
That still doesn�t stop it from hurting.
He feels a hand on his arm and turns to find Watari beside him, a small smile on his lips. Gently, he pushes him a few steps forward to where Tsuzuki is sitting, morose and depressed. When Tatsumi turns and stares at him, Watari smiles brightly and nods.
Things have changed much since he and Tsuzuki were last partners. Some things might have even changed too much.
But Tatsumi finds that he can�t hate the changes too much, because Watari understands and does so with a smile.
- Finis -