Do they make a patch for that?
Me: i’ve had it. i have had it! YOU AND I ARE QUITS, LIVEJOURNAL. I MEAN IT THIS TIME.
LJ: Whatever. Three months and you’ll be crawling back. You always come crawling back.
Me: THAT’S WHAT YOU THINK. SEE THIS? THIS IS THE FLAMING SIGN OF MY COMMITMENT TO JUSTICE!
LJ: …you realise that shirt’s not actually on fire.
Me: OH, SCREW YOU. GOODBYE FOREVER, LJ.
LJ: yeah, yeah, don’t let the new portal blind you on the way out!
Wordpress: WE’LL TAKE YOU IN! 
Me: yay thank you! look at my nice shiny new wordpress!
Everyone: but you can’t thread comments.
Me: but you can comment!
Everyone: ….
Me: oh, dear.
Wordpress: YOU CAN INSTALL WORDPRESS ON YOUR OWN SERVER!
Me: yay!!!! Oh, gosh, look at my pretty site!
Everyone: Yay, we can thread comments!
Me: yay!
Everyone: …but it doesn’t email us when we have replies.
Me: …but you can comment!
Everyone: …
Wordpress:
…
Me: well, there’s always…
Journalfen: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh, wait, you’re serious?
Me: …then again, maybe not.
…
Me: Well, at least I can keep track of my friends using RSS feeds!
Sage: That’s what you think.
Me: …this is incomprehensible.
Sage: don’t be so picky.
Me: hey, while you’re putting posts from three months ago at the top of my feeds could you be sure to change the names so I’ll know who is who?
Sage: I’ll get right on that.
(months later)
Sam: you never write. :(
Me: Oh, Dorrie, of course I try to keep in touch.
Sam: WTF FREAK
Me: I’m sorry, who are you again?
…
LJ: HI, DID YOU MISS US? NOT THAT WE MISSED YOU OR ANYTHING.
ME: NO I DID NOT WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY INBOX.
LJ: WELL, SEE, WE KNOW YOU LOVE US DEEP DOWN SO MUCH THAT WE MADE IT SO YOU RECEIVE OUR NEWSLETTER EVERY MONTH!
Me: but I didn’t subscribe to your newsletter.
LJ: Yes, but you wanted to.
Me: No, I didn’t. I’ll just go unsubscribe right now.
(one month later)
LJ: MISS ME?
Me: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
LJ: Guess you didn’t “unsubscribe” after all.
Me: Yes I did!
LJ: But did you unsubscribe the newsletter from every single journal you own? 
Me: ………. I’ve never hated anything so much in my life. I. I - Oh my god you finally have comment editing.
LJ: See? You just can’t stay away.
…
VLC Player: I’m lonely.
Me: don’t go there.
VLC: but god, i need to compress an .avi, oh god, just one sleek and sexy 350mb file, please please please you know you want it too.
Me: TORRENTS! I WILL USE TORRENTS.
Wireless: LOL no you won’t.
iheartscylla: hey, baby, I can help you out.
iheartcharybdis: I’ve got your proper right here.
VLC: they have Bump of Chicken PVs.
Me: oh my god i’m weak, i’m so weak.
…
Me: but at least with you, lovely WP, I can have pretty formatted fics and posts and oh my god it just ate my section breaks. IT JUST ATE MY SECTION BREAKS
Wordpress:
Me: WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY FIC?
Wordpress:
Me: I JUST HIT RETURN TEN TIMES.
Wordpress:
Me: NOTHING HAPPENED.
Wor-
Me: OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE, IT’S LIKE I MOVED TO STEPFORD
…
Franzi: Why are you saying you left LJ if you’re still updating your journal?
Me: I haven’t updated! IT WAS JUST THE ONE TIME AND DUMBLEDORE WAS GAY.
Franzi: But it says you updated two weeks ago.
Me: But I didn’t…
LJ: We just make the numbers up now, we find it works better that way.
Me: BUT I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE LEAVING YOU. I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MAKING A STATEMENT.
LJ: Oh, yes. About that… we know about your little secret.
Me: Oh god.
LJ: Indeed.
Me: IT WAS JUST A TEMPORARY SOLUTION.
LJ: of course it was.
Me: BECAUSE WORDPRESS WOULDN’T STOP EATING MY SECTIONS AND I WANTED TO POST FIC AND IT WAS EITHER THIS OR FF.NET
LJ: Sure.
Me: OKAY SO I POSTED TO FF.NET TOO BUT REALLY. NO ONE NEEDS TO KNOW. IT CAN BE OUR LITTLE SECRET. YOURS AND MINE.
LJ: Surprise! HOW DO YOU LIKE OUR NEW COMMENT EDITING FUNCTION NOW, SOCKY?
Me: This is the worst time of my entire life.
…
Zoe: I wanted to link you to this fic, but it’s on LJ -
Me: oh just give me the link.
Zoe: but I thought you weren’t reading fics on LJ since you-
Me: JUST GIVE ME THE LINK.
Zoe: …
Me: By the way, your Halloween costume was awesome.
Zoe: that wasn’t me, that was Kish.
Me: ….
Sage: well, honestly, i do all the work of compiling your friends list and then you expect me to properly label everyone’s journals so you know who is who?
Me: ……….
Zoe: are you okay?
Me: could you please just kill me?
Zoe: surely it’s not that bad.
Me: Oh, Daisy. You have no idea.
About this entry
You’re currently reading “Do they make a patch for that?,” an entry on Bookshop
- Published:
- 11.10.07 / 9pm
- Tags:
- fandom, life, livejournal, me, rants
- Related Posts:
- The power of waffling.
- No really, not another post about bump of chicken.
- This post is emo and long, but at least it's a post.
- so tonight i’ll sing a song for all my friends
- Remember, remember
- it's not *for* you.
- inching past the edge of reserve
- I'll pull you out through the space between the bars - admit that you're dirty, the world is all yours.
- moving in
- It's that time again, baby!
- like meat <3's salt.
COME BACK WE PROMISE WE WON’T LAUGH AND SAY ‘WE TOLD YOU SO’ TOO MUCH.
OH YES YOU WILL, I KNOW YOU TOO WELL
YOU CAN TAKE IT.
WELL, I WILL HAVE SNAP PREVIEW AND THOSE SWELL NEW DEFAULT NAVIGATION THEMES TO COMFORT ME
I THINK I LOVE YOU.
BUT WHAT AM I SO AFRAID OF :(
COME HOME, AJA.
LAUREN DID YOU SEE THAT PICTURE DID YOU SEE IT.
LOOK AT WHAT’S WAITING FOR YOU AJA. LOOK.
IT DID NOT WORK. D:
OH MY GOD I ACTUALLY JUST SHRIEKED.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
SOMEHOW THE LOOK ON FUJI’S FACE JUST MAKES IT TEN MILLION TIMES FUCKING BETTER AHAHAHAHA GOD
THERE IS MORE IN MY JOURNAL POST. BUT YOU KNOW. IT’S LJ. :((
AHAHAHAHAHAHA I’M LAUGHING WITH YOU NOT AT YOU.
MY LIFE IS SO COMPLETELY IDIOTIC, I’D LAUGH AT ME TOO
ILU. COME BACK.
ILU TOO. I JUST RE-READ YOUR NOBUTA/BANDO FIC FROM APRIL AND GOT ALL MISTY.
AJA PLEASE COME BACK. WE MISS YOU SO MUCH T_________T
COME BACK TO US. YESSSSS. WE HAVE. UM. OK WE MOSTLY HAVE FLAILING AND WANK BUT COME BACK TO US ANYWAY.
COME BACK, AJA. WE MISS YOU SO MUCH. D:
Livejournal just keeps dragging people back in. XD
=/ I’m sorry you’ve been having such a tough time keeping track of everyone/everything and posting stuff.
If you’re really desperate to post fic you could try insanejournal~ The fandom network isn’t quite as big - but it has a lot of ex-ljers and many have very similar feelings to you on LJ.
oh aja just come back already. :(
…come back. Please?
getting bored in the pitiful wooden shack eh
oh boy, oh boy! the universe is v subtle sometimes, hahaahaa but really: come home! :DDD
Come back assface.
Come back, Aja. If everyone’s laughing at you maybe they won’t notice that I haven’t really left, either. :((
I WANT TO BUT EVERY PLACE ELSE IS A WASTELAND. I MEAN YOU AND I COULD JUST RUN OFF TOGETHER BUT I FEEL LIKE MAYBE I NEED TO SEE OTHER PEOPLE ONCE IN AWHILE. D:
AJA. SRSLY.
*dies laughing*
ILU!!!!!!! :D :D :D